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How have others kept their music habit alive while also having kids?

geetee1972 said:
I'm at the point where I am looking to get rid of my main system and relegate myself to headphones only. I've got two kids and now no spare listening room. The wife is 'amusical' and while the living room isn't small, it's just not got the practicality to keep my system set up, not least because the speakers would never survive.

I know a great solution would be something wall mounted but even before we get into the terrible compromise that could represent, the wife looks at me with a 'if you think you're doing that you're seriously mistaken' face.

It's a frustating as all heck. I used to live without a TV and never without music on and now I'm lucky if I get two hours twice a year (bit like married life sex really!)

So how have the rest of you survived?
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Got one 2 1/2 year old and another one due November this year.

Bought myself some Beyer T70's and plugged them into the Laptop to enjoy my music.

The main system is used for kids music now :D
 
Mr Pig said:
I despair when I see people talking about how their kids wreck stuff and there is nothing they can do about it. I've had friends who's kids broke every ornament they had. The kids aren't bad, it's the parents that are stupid! If you teach the kids how to behave properly, they will. Some people just have no idea how to do that.
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X2

When I was first married we also bought our first house together. The furnished lounge was physically too small to house the system I had before so I sold the lot. It was replaced by a simpler set up that wifey was happy to operate and I was happy(ish);) with the sound.
The onset of kids meant RULES. No direct damage was caused to the hifi by the kids, only a later whoopsy that saw an ornament accidently knocked down onto one 'speaker, just a small dink.

Wifey and I now have different systems suiting different needs. The kids have portables and mini systems and still do not touch ours (@14 & 18).
 
Pete the Feet said:
When the system is on and she enters the room the atmosphere becomes tense, so I usually turn it off and encourage her to leave the room.
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Arkless Repairs said:
It does seem to be the case, in my experience, that women are generally nowhere near as keen on music as we are...
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This is true of my experience too. I miss crashing out with a bunch of mates listening to music. We used to take turns to pick tracks and take music to each other's houses. Had to listen to a lot of heavy metal! ;0)

My wife's just not interested. She doesn't 'get' most of the music I like and certainly has little musical sensitivity. She's learning though. I'd be listening to something, and it would be just getting to the best bit, and she'd barge in, turn it down and ask me something. I took the head off her! I said 'How would you like it if you were watching a good film, it was just getting to the climax and I switched the TV off and started talking to you? Or yanked the book you were reading out of your hand?'. It sounds daft but she just did not get how involved in music other people can be. It's just background to her. I tend to get piece now.

If your wife and kids watch TV it's a good idea to get a TV in another room. If the bedroom is a nice place to watch TV she'll maybe be quite happy to disappear off there to watch it leaving you the stereo. My wife rarely watches TV, I reckon the TV is on for maybe half-an-hour a day in our house, some days it's not on at all. I had it on for a few minutes earlier to see if there was anything worth watching on. Wasn't.
 
The best solutions suggested heree revolve around one word EDUCATION - after all it is a major part of being a parent.

Never did anything more than put the LP12 at a reasonable distance from the floor - the right height for using it without having to bend suited our family - the SME 20/2A is on that self same stand now.
 
Headphones detatch you from hearing what the kids are up to which could backfire a bit. My advice after 3 now 9, 13 & 15 is don't change a thing and look forward to the day they laugh at you in the 'listening position' listening to 'sad old fashioned music'....

We live in a big open plan space and always manage to negotiate our little obsessions without too much hassle whether its Loud Zep, Coronation Street, Tracey Beaker or Minecraft. G
 
You could do what I did: have a kid who loves music. My oldest has always loved music--real music, not kid stuff--and his interest in it has reignited mine. He was the one who insisted that we listen to the Joy Division box set I got for Christmas (when he was two), as well as Blur and Radiohead (when he was three), The Strokes (at five), etc. Lately, we've been listening to a lot of Brian Eno. His favorite is Here Come the Warm Jets.
 
When I bought my house my main priority was to have my own listening room. After that everything was easy, my kids had the permission to come and also touch the units but I explained them how to do so.
I could hear very much music due to the fact that there wasn't great affection between me and my wife: we did competitive sport together, which means also lots of practice together, but really other than that we were two independent persons with complete different ways of feeling things. Each of us could keep our private live and that's how I could keep a develop my passion for music without family interference. That is also not the best. :)
 
How have others kept their music habit alive while also having kids?

Should have read

How have others kept their music habit alive when their wife is the greatest barrier to listening!

Kids have just meant that the frequency has dropped from a few times a month to a few times a year. I've had my own listening room for four years now (three of which were child free) and whenever I went up there, the wife had one of those 'what was the point of getting married if all you're going to do is secrete yourself away in another room' looks.

Music in the living room is met with the same tension referenced above!
 
my hifi is in the living room so i rarely get a chance to listen to it these days other than when the missus is at work on saturday when i'm off. seriously thinking about giving up this hobby of ours and getting an audiolab m-dac and a set of closed-back headphones.
when my daughter was a toddler (now 17) she used to pull the valves out of my audio innovations 500, i've also came home to find my stylus completely missing from a lyra helikon cartridge. yesterday i took my audio research ls22 pre in to my dealer to have a toggle switch fitted as my other half somehow walked into it she said! she also bent the stylus on my goldring cartridge this week whilst dusting, it snapped when i tried to straighten it of course.
 
Keep it! A house full of kids and music is a happy house. Just teach them not to touch-easy, oh and this turning the sounds off is daft too they'll learn to sleep with normal everyday home noise and not be the kind of kids who wake up at a pin drop.
If you lose your sounds you'll never get them back as 2 sprogs aged 6-9 are a bit of a drain on your pocket.....
 
My LP12 on a low level Target rack survived 3 kids . I used to play it at normal volume levels until quite late. They soon got used to it.
 
I remember making a strap to go round my LP12 lid / plinth after I lost a K18 to curious little hands.
Now my oldest is 19 and has unsurprisingly developed an interest in Hi-Fi. Having given him a Lenco GL75 for his 18th, it's my vinyl that's now at risk especially when he has been out on the bevvies.

Mark
 
Personally I would never allow my wife to tell me what to do with my system - we've been together for 33 years now and not once did I ever consider like many of my cowardly friends put my components in the basement where I've seen a great of of damage done to these guys system as well as water damage to their vinyl. I don't play that " But then again I've always worn the Pants ". And as for kids - we've 5 with all of them grown now, but even at the tender ages of 2 and upwards I never had a one of them approach my system - maybe it was the nasty look I gave them as well as having a firm voice - but once again " I don't play that shit ", I've earned my money toward building a nicer life for my family and there's no way in hell I'd have a woman tell me what to spend on my system - not alone tell me how to go about setting it up - or what room it should be in. Too me those are grounds for divorce. No shit, some of you guys have become a tad bit to concerned about pleasing your wife - what about oweing something to yourself - after all she can take her ass home back to mommy!, but that's just the Blackness in me coming out. Get some balls I'd say. Damn, Oscar
 
Mr Pig said:
If you teach the kids to be careful with things, not to touch certain things, you won't have a problem. My Hi-Fi has never been removed, hidden or protected. The kids have never done any harm to it. In fact the only damage I have ever had was a visiting teenager pushing in a tweeter on my Kans!

I despair when I see people talking about how their kids wreck stuff and there is nothing they can do about it. I've had friends who's kids broke every ornament they had. The kids aren't bad, it's the parents that are stupid! If you teach the kids how to behave properly, they will. Some people just have no idea how to do that.

But they usually bleat on about how they've tried everything but that's just the way the kids are. Garbage! You watch them with the kids and they are just utterly clueless. Nobody likes being told they don't know how to discipline their kids though so there is nothing you can do about it.

Unless of course the kids have some kind of mental health problem, which some do. I know a few folk who had kids that were a huge problem when they were younger, one spent half his childhood drugged up to keep him on the ground. But if you've got normal kids, teach them. They are smart, even as toddlers. If you can train a dog not to crap in your house you can certainly train a child not to smash up your Hi-Fi.
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I agree wholeheartedly. I raised two children, now teenagers, without ever hiding anything or suffering any damage. I'm sure it's not entirely luck.; but touch wood just in case.
 
Kt77 said:
Personally I would never allow my wife to tell me what to do with my system - we've been together for 33 years now and not once did I ever consider like many of my cowardly friends put my components in the basement where I've seen a great of of damage done to these guys system as well as water damage to their vinyl. I don't play that " But then again I've always worn the Pants ". And as for kids - we've 5 with all of them grown now, but even at the tender ages of 2 and upwards I never had a one of them approach my system - maybe it was the nasty look I gave them as well as having a firm voice - but once again " I don't play that shit ", I've earned my money toward building a nicer life for my family and there's no way in hell I'd have a woman tell me what to spend on my system - not alone tell me how to go about setting it up - or what room it should be in. Too me those are grounds for divorce. No shit, some of you guys have become a tad bit to concerned about pleasing your wife - what about oweing something to yourself - after all she can take her ass home back to mommy!, but that's just the Blackness in me coming out. Get some balls I'd say. Damn, Oscar
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"O" what's up, my Brother. I feel ya. My kids didn't get near my setup and it was always in the living room. At present, my wife's daughter and her grandchildren don't have any respect for anything someone else has worked hard for. I put my system in the home office while working on letting everyone concerned know that if there isn't some respect built for what I work my ass off for, then they simply aren't welcome in my home.

My setup has always been operated by me only. My wife also has a nice setup and I just bought her new speakers to rotate with her others and I'm about to give her a turntable. Her Granddaughter is coming to stay with us for the summer so I will move my main setup to my home office and leave a nice HT in the main living area. It's a pretty good setup as well. These are all my choices and my wife usually supports them.
 
The Hi-Fi was there before the wife or the kids, my children soon got to know that Dads ( not the families) Hi-Fi was a no go area.

Only problem i ever had was a family friends badly behaved wicked child who pushed in a tweeter dust cap - as they do.

My sister visited not so long ago - With her 3 young kids they soon learnt that when uncle Tim said don't touch that, what he actually meant was - DONT F**ING TOUCH THAT- EVER !

Children should be thrashed for no reason whatsoever so that they know what it might feel like when they get thrashed for something,
 
ArtK said:
"O" what's up, my Brother. I feel ya. My kids didn't get near my setup and it was always in the living room. At present, my wife's daughter and her grandchildren don't have any respect for anything someone else has worked hard for, so I put my system in the home office while working on letting everyone concerned know that if there isn't some respect built for what I work my ass off for then they simply aren't welcome in my home.

My setup has always been operated by me only. My wife also has a nice setup and I just bought her new speakers to rotate with her others and I'm about to give her a turntable. Her Granddaughter is coming to stay with us for the summer so I will move my main setup to my home office and leave a nice HT in the main living area. It's a pretty good setup as well. These are all my choices and my wife usually supports them.
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"O" Art my Brother - How Art Thou?, it's been awhile since I've seen you ink anything on your Blog - and yes I'm checking daily I might add. Well I'm proud of you for standing firm - I know that even though I'm on the East Coast and you're on the West, we share many of the same old school values - my wife knows about my comfort zone and knows all to well as she has always told the children " Let Daddy Be ". I'm one of those Cats whom worked hard for over half my life before becoming ill where I had to step down for health reasons - I've always told my kids " You've always had shelter - food - clothing - loving parents ( a rarity in itself to have both in home these days ) - someone who believed in you when you've had doubts about your choices in life - someone whom pushed education - someone whom kept them out or jail or getting caught up in the streets - someone whom doesn't allow failure nor disrespect of ones elders - one whom isn't going to hold their hands when they fall, as it's their choice to find balance in life. " So with that being said - I tell them with a big smile your Mother and I have done our job, they rest is on them. But I'm feeling you too little Brother and would add " You Go Boy ". Be at peace my young Brother and endure whatever crosses your path. Salam Brother Moharam * ( PS - Ask Dale about my raw nature - I'm just keeping it real - yet my wife and kids think I'm somewhat to Raw - but as I said earlier on " Let Me Be ". ) take care my youngest Brother. Peace once again Beyond to You and Yours.
 
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