Ian Dury, New Boots and Panties. Naughty but nice-
Had a love affair with Nina
In the back of my Cortina
A seasoned up hyena
Could not have been more obscener
She took me to the cleaners
And other misdemeanours
But I got right up between her
Rum and her Ribena
[Refrain]
Well, you ask Joyce and Vicki
If candy-floss is sticky
I'm not a blinking thicky
I'm Billericay Dickie
And i'm doing very well
I bought a lot of brandy
When I was courting Sandy
Took eight to make her randy
And all I had was shandy
Another thing with Sandy
What often came in handy
Was passing her a 'Mandy'
She didn't half go bandy
So you ask Joyce and Vicki
If I ever took the mickey
I'm not a flipping thicky
I'm Billericay Dickie
And I'm doing very well
I'd rendezvous with Janet
Quite near the Isle of Thanet
She looked more like a gannet
She wasn't half a prannet
Her mother tried to ban it
Her father helped me plan it
And when I captured Janet
She bruised her pomegranet
So you ask Joyce and Vicki
If i ever shaped up tricky
I'm not a blooming thicky
I'm Billericay Dickie
And I'm doing very well
You should never hold a candle
If you don't know where it's been
The jackpot is in the handle
On a normal fruit machine