Baby Reindeer > Fiona Harvey
- Thread starter richardg
- Start date
I watched the whole thing. Would have preferred not to have. But I didn’t read what happened between him and the TV guy as rape. He went round to the guys house, they both did a stupefying amount of drugs, had sex, he felt degraded in some way, and he kept going back for more. Don‘t see that as rape. Did he similarly get entangled with the stalker more than he needed to have?
droodzilla
pfm Member
He consented to the drugs. He didn’t consent to having his cock gobbled while he was unconscious. That was rape.
Well said
So why did he keep going round? And taking stupefying amounts of drugs? Once may be rape. Going back for more makes it very hard to convince me that it was rape rather than a penchant for drug fuelled sleazy sex, which he later regretted.
droodzilla
pfm Member
Why don't more battered wives leave their abusive partners? They're asking for it, in a way.
Tony Lockhart
Avoiding Stress, at Every Opportunity
No doubt some still think that Savile's targets were partly to blame.
There's a psychological weapon deployed by that sort of rapist. They know when someone is desperate for success, and know they will succumb to the mild pressure. I was targeted many years ago, thankfully only plied with drink. The feelings lingered for years... the what ifs etc. 20 years old, and quite vulnerable to the gliding club's barman. I've a reasonably strong pair of shoulders, and I had the presence of mind to just get away asap. Someone else may not have been so lucky.
There's a psychological weapon deployed by that sort of rapist. They know when someone is desperate for success, and know they will succumb to the mild pressure. I was targeted many years ago, thankfully only plied with drink. The feelings lingered for years... the what ifs etc. 20 years old, and quite vulnerable to the gliding club's barman. I've a reasonably strong pair of shoulders, and I had the presence of mind to just get away asap. Someone else may not have been so lucky.
I am quite staggered by your level of ignorance.
Well fill me in. Assuming he’s telling the truth of course, which it seems increasingly unlikely he is not.
But you didn’t go back repeatedly. This guy did. He made some bad decisions, but he’s an adult, he has to live with them. Not at all comparable to Savile. In your case, someone bought you drinks and made a pass at you, which you rejected. Happens to thousands of women every Friday night, Shouldn’t traumatise you for years.
Tony Lockhart
Avoiding Stress, at Every Opportunity
It’s you that is saying he “made a pass” at me. I didn’t.
And I wasn’t planning my whole future around being a glider pilot.
daytona600
Registered User
Never let the truth get in the way of a good story - Mark Twain
Just do some research around the subject, gain knowledge rather than just make a sweeping statement.
I mean, at the very least victim blaming is not really the done thing.
I don’t see him as a victim. He repeatedly sought out degrading sex with strangers, mixed with drugs and booze. They can hardly all have been rapists. He had a relationship with a guy from which he got some things he needed at the time, including evidently degrading sex and drugs and booze. Although since they were both voluntarily out of it at the time, he has no idea what happened. There’s no accusation of drinks being spiked. The TV guy does not deserve to be defamed as a rapist. An opportunist maybe, but generous also.
richardg
Admonishtrator
He also took one up the gary in another scene. Fairly sure that was rape too.
paulfromcamden
Baffled
Here's a factsheet explaining consent during chemsex.
In chemsex situations, or any situation where drugs or alcohol are present, it is easy for people to lose the capacity to consent. If someone is asleep, unconscious, or so ‘out of it’ that they cannot make a decision for themselves, then they cannot consent. If someone has sex with you while you’re unable to consent, this is sexual assault.
Please stop, you are making a complete tit of yourself!
But who knows who did what to who? He has no memory of what happened, only supposition. He may have consented at the time. Nobody knows. He just felt crap when he woke up with a drug hangover. Tough. He doesn’t allege penetration, so there’s no rape. Arguably assault. Equally he may have assaulted the other guy. Nobody knows. But the fact is he went back. Many times. So I can’t see any basis for an accusation of rape or abuse. Just sex that he later regretted. It happens. He also had a lot of drug fuelled sex with strangers which he later regretted. All those partners cant all be rapists. Maybe he just gets off on degrading himself, and doing so in public is even more of a turn on. Maybe he was conflicted about being bisexual. Mabe he encouraged the lassie, and got off on the humiliation, just like he kept on humiliating himself with a dreadful comedy routine, and now completes his humiliation with this TV series. I’ve no sympathy for the guy whatsoever. I hope that him, the BBC, who own Clerkenwell films who made the series, and Netflix are hauled over the coals.