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Help for bullies

Snufkin

pfm Member
There is much talk about various disadvantaged groups of children due to Schools operating at reduced levels but there is one group that have been completely ignored - bullies.

How can these valued and important members of the school community thrive if there are no other children around them to bully? Has any thought been given to how this group of children are being disadvantaged? Why isn't the Government announcing counseling sessions and additional coaching so that bullies don't miss out? There are so many questions that have yet to be asked, let alone answered, about this important part of the School community.
 
I think we should do a fundraiser, so...

give me your f'cking lunch-money now, or I'll kick you in the balls!
 
Whilst I understand that this is intended to be a humorous thread it may not appear that way to anyone who has ever been bullied, at school or anywhere else.
 
There's the entire internet for them to prowl before they are elected to public office or become police officers.

They'll be just fine.

they grow up, buy hifi and join internet fora. Where they shout their opinions with pseudo authority, and beat down others
 
Whilst I understand that this is intended to be a humorous thread it may not appear that way to anyone who has ever been bullied, at school or anywhere else.
Which is exactly why I started the thread. It has not been mentioned in the media, but for some children not going to School will be a blessing. Most organisations not only have bullying, but usually deny its existence and some even encourage it. Look at the mess that RBS got into under Fred Goodwin.
 
Which is exactly why I started the thread. It has not been mentioned in the media, but for some children not going to School will be a blessing. Most organisations not only have bullying, but usually deny its existence and some even encourage it. Look at the mess that RBS got into under Fred Goodwin.

The bullied at work almost always have to leave (often through ill health) while the bully is supported, especially when the bully is at a senior manangement level. I've supported quite a few people is these circumstances with cases that dragged on for a couple of years.
 
There is much talk about various disadvantaged groups of children due to Schools operating at reduced levels but there is one group that have been completely ignored - bullies.

How can these valued and important members of the school community thrive if there are no other children around them to bully? Has any thought been given to how this group of children are being disadvantaged? Why isn't the Government announcing counseling sessions and additional coaching so that bullies don't miss out? There are so many questions that have yet to be asked, let alone answered, about this important part of the School community.
Is bullying not dealt with effectively in schools these days? Awareness/ education about all forms of abuse seems to be far better nowadays and when these issues can be talked about in the open and given a name, it takes much of the power away from the perpetrators who would previously have relied on silence in order to operate. The other matter of course is that the bully is likely to be acting out / repeating behaviours due to matters of concern in their own home life. The bullying child will have a bullying parent, step-parent or sibling etc.
 
Is bullying not dealt with effectively in schools these days? Awareness/ education about all forms of abuse seems to be far better nowadays and when these issues can be talked about in the open and given a name, it takes much of the power away from the perpetrators who would previously have relied on silence in order to operate. The other matter of course is that the bully is likely to be acting out / repeating behaviours due to matters of concern in their own home life. The bullying child will have a bullying parent, step-parent or sibling etc.
No way is it dealt with effectively in either of the schools we have sent our kids to, UK and France. There is plenty of procedure and public claim of how seriously they take it, though. What I have seen on more than one occasion (well, 2 actually) is that the bullies stayed put, eventually the bullied changed schools.
 
The other matter of course is that the bully is likely to be acting out / repeating behaviours due to matters of concern in their own home life. The bullying child will have a bullying parent, step-parent or sibling etc.
Not necessarily. I think bullying is an innate behaviour, and it is gratifying because it gives the bully power. We have all met bullies in the corporate world, and they gain and retain power. Because unfortunately in a lot of workplaces bullying works. I have seen it work, in the short term at least.

I was bullied a fair bit at school, I was very small and an academic type, so an obvious target, and I'm rather ashamed to admit I did a bit of bullying in my turn. If there is some other kid getting the shit kicked out of him, then it's not you.

As I got older, around 16, the bullying took a more subtle psychological turn, as I understand it currently does on Facebook etc. I dealt with it by following the ringleader home one night, waiting until he was on his own and then giving him a shove and saying "Right, you and me. Let's go. You haven't got your mates to back you up, so let's go. Right now". It was a gamble, he was bigger, stronger and fitter than I and he would have won very convincingly, but I reckoned correctly that he firstly wasn't a fighter and secondly didn't want the collateral damage. I knew at 16 we were both big enough to do proper damage and I was determined that win or lose we were both going to go home bleeding. I also reckoned that as the popular kid and the son of the local doctor he wasn't going to want to face his parents and his mates at school with a black eye, a fat lip and bruises. Win or lose, he was going to lose. I didn't have anything to lose. He backed down and left me alone thereafter. His little gang had a few goes but he never joined in, because he knew damn well that he was going to be walking down Schoolhouse Lane again that evening, and it was only too easy for me to follow him for that quarter-mile stroll and pick up where we'd left off.

I'm not sure how this translates into a modern world. Corporate bullying is a very real thing and it is glamorised by the TV shows like Apprentice, Gordon Ramsey in kitchens and so on. I know very well they wouldn't walk into a meat factory and throw their weight about like that, if they didn't have an accident by falling in the cold store they would have an unfortunate meeting one night in the car park. However not everyone is prepared to tackle the bullies like that, and the bullies become very adept at not bullying the slaughterman with convictions for assault and ABH because they know very well how it will end.
 
In the real world I inhabited facing up to the bully just got your head kicked in and full ostracising from the group.
Much easier to buy them off with Woodbines.
 
In the real world I inhabited facing up to the bully just got your head kicked in and full ostracising from the group.
Frequently true. However, in my real world, the bully didn't actually want to get physical. Especially on his own.
 
Dealt with my school bully in the woodwork store room. Caught on his own, unawares and I smacked him in the face, blood pouring from his nose. Nothing came back, and I was probably the smallest boy in the class. The woodwork teacher told me that was well overdue. Said bully never came near me or my friend (who had a work in progress sculpture smashed up) again.

I have seen plenty of corporate bullies - snivelling incompetents the lot of them... the very definition of having been promoted beyond their competence. Most get found out eventually.

Also had to deal with bullies down on the factory floor....some of those were really quite nasty pieces of work. I managed to sack the worst, at some financial cost, and things were much improved. Interesting that not every employee was intimidated by him...one guy 'Basher', still works for us, was well able to tell the bully where to go.

In a previous workplace I have seen Union bullies at work. Not good. On a related point some chaps I employed over the years had been through Longbridge, which is not far away. They have some choice views about the workplace situation with Red Robbo. So not all workplace bullies work from 'above'.
 


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