The Scottish government of the day (led by Alex Salmond) agreed the bill that allowed a referendum to take place. Moaning now about it is too late - the Scottish Government are bound by their own agreement over the matter of future referendums. To Alex Salmonds surprise they lost, again a large quiet contingent of voters chose to stay in the union. Scotland thus will have to wait a suitable period of time before trying again. The Supreme Court came to the same view that the Scottish Attorney General came to.
SNP clearly want a referendum after referendum after referendum until they get the result they want. Do you really believe that the SNP would ever allow another referendum for unionists after they get the result they want. Of course not.
The decent way to proceed is to wait a decent amount of time (I would say 15 or even 20 years) for such a momentous choice. 5 would be seen as way too short in historical terms. You need another generation to have their say and the current politicians to have moved on somewhat too.
Re-joining the EU is practical impossibility at present for a variety of reasons. So, it is a red herring. Anyway, why go 'independent' from the UK and then try to join the EU where there would be far less 'independence' on a variety of fronts - it just does not make sense. Anyone think the EU would subside the Scottish economy in the same way that Westminster does? Dream on. Yes, you could export products more 'easily', but the EU is about a lot more than that!